If they ask me what type of place the world is, I’ll tell them. I believe the world has many charms and beauty, but it is also “scary”! Life is scary because it is unpredictable; we are frequently confronted with ambiguities and complex issues that will destroy us if we are not prepared to cope with them ahead of time. Many unpleasant occurrences occur in our lives, such as the death of relatives, divorce, disease, crime, and so on. I am a kid from yesterday who is dealing with similar concerns now, and I frequently don’t know how to deal with the “pain” of these situations. I’ve been shattered many times, crushed many times, and drowned in sadness many times until I’ve learned to not bow in the face of challenges and to persevere. What can I do now, as a parent, to help my child navigate the storm of adulthood with excellent mental health and the appropriate choices? I’m not sure how I’m going to equip him/her

As parents, we must realize that we will never be able to completely insulate our children from life’s challenges. This is impossible, and the biggest betrayal we are doing to children is acting as a shield for them today so that financial issues, family crises, and losses do not affect them. So, what are your options in this situation? The best answer to this issue is “resilience” training.

Resilience is defined as the ability to deal with challenging difficulties and events healthily and flexibly. If a person is to face power in the face of life’s failures and not fail, he/she must be resilient. In reality, one of the most important variables in preventing mental illnesses including anxiety, depression, obsession, and others is resilience…

What are the best ways to teach our children this vital skill? In this subject, a variety of solutions and strategies have been presented, all of which must be relevant and simple for families. I’m going to lay out three ways for increasing our children’s resilience that is highly practical, workable, and understandable.

Sterategy1: Stabilize a consistent ratio of sleep, food, and daily recreation.

The fact that a person does not feel threatened in a situation or crisis is the most important resilience factor that influences subsequent choices and reactions. Regulating sleep, diet, and entertainment is one of the main strategies for controlling the perception of risk. Monitor how much time children spend sleeping, eating, and playing to achieve this. How many hours each day, for example, does he/she watch his/ her favorite TV show and program?

How many hours a day does he /she sleep? What time does he /she usually eat and snack?

Observe these completely for three days and then try to stabilize them. Note that in this technique we do not intend to manipulate or remind children of bad habits. That means you don’t have to worry about whether it’s good to sit in front of the TV for three hours. Just try to keep it stable. This implies that if your kid sleeps for 20 minutes one evening and two hours the next, you should raise their average sleep time to one hour every day. In this case, you may alter the amount of physical activity during the day, as well as modeling for sleep by a parent or soothing the home environment to sleep in the middle of the day, so that the quantity of sleep can be regulated and reasonably steady.

According to studies, if you ask someone why you did something.
He / She defends himself or herself by stating a reasonable and accurate argument or making excuses.

In any case, if you’re also trying to figure out why your child makes mistakes, I can assure you that your relationship with your child will be damaged in no time.

As a result, teaching him/her to seek for a mistake after he/she has made one is preferable to teaching him/her to look for the reason.

For instance, the:

False: Why did you paint the walls?

Correct: How to clean the walls?

False: Why did you mislead your cousin?

Correct: How do we make amends for your cousin?

False: Why did not you greet your father?

Correct: When your father is tired, how can we greet him/her?

In reality, by asking the question “how,” your child’s mind becomes familiar with the cycle of thinking and solution, and develops problem-solving and resiliency abilities. He /She also gradually learns to take responsibility for his/her difficulties, build his/her tolerance for admitting himself or herself as a wrongdoer, and settle conflicts peacefully.

In reality, by asking the question “how,” your child’s mind becomes familiar with the cycle of thinking and solution, and develops problem-solving and resiliency abilities. He /She also gradually learns to take responsibility for his/her difficulties, build his/her tolerance for admitting himself or herself as a wrongdoer, and settle conflicts peacefully.

Part 2: Use the methods below when the kid makes a mistake and accepts it.

You must first avoid three things before proceeding to the next five stages, which are detailed below. The implementation of these eight elements is so critical that if one of them is overlooked, not only will it badly harm your relationship with your kid in the long run, but his/her resilience will also decrease, and he/she will be unable to effectively manage his/her difficulties.

3 things parents should not do in these situations:

1. Do not blame him/her

Blaming the other, whether in the parent-child situation or other situations, is of no benefit to the listener or speaker. In addition, it is one of the most toxic things a parent can do. Blaming is one of the main factors damaging the relationship between children and parents, and it is also the beginning of your child’s secrecy and lying.

As a parent, you may believe that this is part of your child’s upbringing and that if he/she remembers all of the times and words of blame, he/she will forget these rebukes or threats and it influences his/her following choices decisions.

Other things you should avoid doing in this situation include reminding him/her of your past warnings about his/her error. This is the root of your child’s stubbornness and rebellion.

2. Do not suppress his /her emotions.

Some parents, out of compassion, unwittingly when their child is upset about something instead of empathizing with his /her feelings and allowing their child to experience the thrill of grief as well.

They attempt to cheer him/her up right away by saying things like “Don’t weep, it’s not worth it; we’ll get it for you again.” They are unaware, however, that by doing so, they are inadvertently teaching him/her the following concept: “Never allow yourself to be unhappy, and anytime you are upset, quickly replace that unhappiness with something pleasurable.”

I’m not trying to terrify you, but here’s something I’d want to say to you while you do this: One of the basic components of addiction, substance abuse, or anything else is this behavior…

In these cases, you should identify with his/her emotions and exhilaration. Sit next to him/her and give him/her open-ended questions about his/her feelings, such as:

• Are you in a bad mood? What are your actual feelings? Do you want to chat about emotions for a minute? What are your current thoughts? In addition…

The key to keeping in mind this emotional friendship and empathy are that if there is too much empathy, the youngster will become “spoiled.”

Indeed, empathy should be such that it does not suffocate or lust. You must pay attention to the condition of your child’s face during empathy to comprehend if we have empathized sufficiently. Your child’s voice and facial expressions are linked when the emotion is completely transmitted, indicating that his / her body language also communicates discomfort. You should stop empathizing once her facial expressions alter. In this case, go to the third step.

3. Do not hurry

• Remove yourself from the situation so that he/she may be alone with himself or herself.

• Stop talking to him/her about it.

• If he makes a mistake that nonetheless has an impact on the environment, leave it alone for the time being. For example, if a glass breaks, do not gather the shattered pieces right away. Of course, this is only if not removing the negative impacts does not affect others.

• Carry on with your normal activities, and if your child approaches you, treat him/her as if nothing had occurred.

Then, in an appropriate setting, carry out the other five steps outlined below to accelerate the recruiting and resilience-building process.

1. Define the problem in a few details as feasible, but only if the task is not forbidden or taboo. For example, if the issue involves rape, the details of the situation should not be completely investigated. A more detailed explanation of the problem, on the other hand, will result in a more accurate remedy for your kid.

2. What is his/her solution to this dilemma, you could inquire? Allow him/her to describe everything in detail, and then ask him/her, “Well, what else?” in this landlord’s tone. What do you believe will happen if you do it, or what do you think will happen if you don’t do it? “Let me repeat what you just said to be sure I got it right. “Assist him/her in addressing all aspects of the solution he/she is considering.

3. Remember previous crises. You teach him/her the consequences, confidence in his /her ability to handle the situation, and finally foresight by doing it. For instance, if he/she has previously broken something with his/her ball, explain it to him/her without any negative emotional connotations. Assume you were playing ball with your father at a hotel two years ago when the television frame broke. We went with your father to pay the fee if you recall. So make certain it’s the same this time, and we’ll figure it out.

4. Remind him/her/ his inconsistency. For example, if he/she breaks a glass, remind him/her that he/she assisted you in cleaning up your dinner table last night, moved several dishes, and did not break any. This will affirm and let your kid know that even if he/she makes a mistake, he/she still has credibility with you and you trust him/her

5. Seek his assistance in the future on the same problem where he/she failed. For example, if he/she receives a low mark in one class, ask him/her for assistance in another lesson in which he excels, and tell him/her how you believe this issue should be conveyed so that someone who does not understand this lesson would fit. This helps to build your child’s self-esteem, which is a key component of resilience.